I am sick of overpaid assholes.

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I am sick of overpaid assholes.

I just found out recently what Tom Cruise's take for his most recent Pissing Impossible film is and I'm still fuming. Do you know what the man makes ? Do you ?

25% of the gross. Twenty-five percent of the gross !!!

For fucks sake ! Can you belive this shit ? Some douchebag that can't act, is so fucking dumb as to be a Scientologist, and not only that, but admit to it, even go to the unheard of lengths of hoping on couches with Oprah trying to promote the crap! He's fucking ugly. He's short enough he can pass under my erect cock and not get his head slammed. What the fuck did he do ?

No, really, name a good role he ever did. What was it, Captain Homoerotic in TopGun ? A McGuire so unconvincing and dumb-looking you thought it was Don King half the time ? He and Demi Moore are the two women in A Few Good Men. Nickolson should have raped his ass with his fucking sidearm. Now that would have been entertaining.

And this little shit gets 25% of the gross of just one the biggest franchises in the film industry. What the fuck did he do ? Who even signs a deal like that, for the studio ? The film cost what, 60-70 Million to make. It opened at not even 50 million domestic. What the fuck, the film is in a 10 million dollar hole and Tom cruises away with 15 million cash, minimum ? Whoever signed that should be shot. Actually, upon investigation, it comes out that it was originally more! It was. The studio threatened to pull the plug so Mr. Cruisy accepted a slight pay cut.

So what is the guy's contribution to that film ? A stuffed animal could have satisfied the performance. The Koreeans could have made an android that would have outperformed Cruisy, for a million or two.

Oh, but he's also the producer, I can hear some idiot offer. No, really ? I bet he is. I bet he plays wet nurse to the actors and personally yells at the delivery people. I bet he actually works his ass off producing all fucking day long. It's not like he delegates all the work to someone being paid a fixed salary, like God meant it, while he spends all the time trying to come up with ways to milk the backers out of as much cash as possible. Special edition red pine stage scaffoldings at 255$ a board ? Sure, gimme two trucks. What's the kickback on that ? 10% ? No way, make it 25% or I go with white cedars.

Even if he tried, the man can't produce a continuous string of shit without a brain transplant, let alone a film thingy. I mean sure, he's done the research. But can he act ? Can he produce ? Can he even sit put for five God damned minutes and impersonate a stable human being ? He should be fucking shot.

But he's a star, I can hear you. What does that even mean ? It means people go to see his films. So let's get it straight, this asshole should be paid an ungodly ammount of money, not for anything he does, but for what other people do, and something that's quite frankly entirely outside his control, to boot. Fucking genius. How about a better business model, how about instead of paying Tom Cruise because people came to see his films, we pay people going to see films because they went to see films ? How about anything with a star in it is free ?

That's fucking it. This is henceforth my official stand on Copyright and Intellectual Property Rights. Everything with a star in it is free. Note it down, memorize it and fucking live by it.

And before you start, I don't have an issue with Cruise personally. Here's another example : Kellen Winslow. Shitty player. Only gets picked because of the complicated way picks work, his own merit has jack shit to do with the entire thing. Breaks a leg on the field. With a still healing broken leg and a contract specifically saying he's not to ride motorcycles, Winslow (hey, at least the name gives fair warning) proceeds to not only ride a motorcycle, but do so in the most stupid way imaginable. Crashes and burns. Good.

Why the fuck should this asshole have a multi million contract in the first place ? What does he contribute to humanity ? I posit any hooker on any street anywhere does more for the well being of humanity than this idiot. Why the fuck should he get a multi million contract ? What's wrong with a crumpled twenty and something warm in his belly ?

They found a half cure for HIV a few years back. Doesn't work perfectly, but it at least keeps AIDS at bay. It wasn't the aliens that did that, it was some guys in a couple labs. Where's their multi million dollar contracts ? Where's their 25% of the gross ? Or at least, name any one of them. Didn't think so.

Well what the fuck ? There's a superbowl every year. They all are exactly identical to each other. They all suck. There's an action film released every week. They all are exactly identical to each other. They all suck. Who gives a shit about the stupid things ? And why should some decerebrated muppet running around with their elbows up their nostrils make more than minimum wage ?

All the "Celebs", shit movie stars, cretin athletes, TV personalities, Karaoke singers et all belong in the fucking Projects. I swear I will never pay a cent for any media that resulted in anyone being paid over 100k a year. Madonna song ? P2P it. Live Footbal game ? LiveStream it. Mission Impossible III ? torrent it if you think it's worth the disk space. I personally don't, and I sit on ~50Gb of empty disk. But at least while it's empty it's clean.

The fuck with all of them. The day I see Tom Cruise living in welfare apartments I might consider paying for content.

As a result of this article, 13 dumbass celebrities are now living on welfare. Viva la revolucion!

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