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Fast and simple, the best spent money in your life (since you obviously cheaped out on contraception). Someone was complaining about his cat the other day, the cute little thing turned 6 months and it started doing the chirp. You know the chirp. That sound, reminiscent of Satan himself being kicked in the balls and having his hemorrhoids punctured by wooden toothpicks.
Everybody told him to have it castrated. Well, there was some weirdo that said he should stick a Q-tip in the cat, but we'll skip him. The point is, nobody came up with Ritalin, nobody suggested counseling, nobody said "Well maybe you should buy it that car already". No. Castration. Unanimously. If someone complains about their teenager, nobody ever comes up with castration. Why not ? People are stupid, it's the obvious solution. Look at this check list if you aren't convinced.
There you have it, 70% success rate. Show me another medical procedure on the market that's even half as effectual ! And who wants to cure teenagers of sitting quietly somewhere anyway ? Think about how much money you will be saving in the long run. Besides, castration is a simple, fast and safe procedure, which can be performed on boys as in-patient surgery. Girls will probably have to spend the night at the hospital, but at least that way you will be rid of them for almost an entire day ! And as a bonus, you can throw in a circumcision too, thus solving even more problems over the years. If you still aren't convinced, you probably don't realize what a danger unspaded teenagers pose to themselves and everyone around them. Meet Rachel Holt. The 34-year-old Delaware teacher is facing rape charges for allegedly having sex with a 13-year-old student 28 times during a one-week period last month. Holt, a science teacher at Claymont Elementary School, allegedly had sex with the boy, a student in her class, at her Wilmington home. That comes to four times a day. The poor woman. What if it was your wife ? What if your wife is next ? Better get rid of those great balls of fire before it's too late, and talk to everyone in your neighbourhood. If you all act together, like a community, the bad guys don't stand a chance. A properly fixed female can not get pregnant, and usually has no interest to even try. A spaded boy is much less likely to get into fights, sexually assault anyone or generally be a jerk. And with the reduction in jacking off, you will probably get along on half your current household consumption of detergent. Don't you think it's time you did something for the environment ? By now, you're probably wondering if having your teenagers neutered is even legal. It most definitely is, the parents can legally decapitate their offspring up to the 18th week of intra-uterine life, and sterilize them up to the 18th year of extra-uterine life. Inquire with your local Town Council for a list of clinics that perform the operation. Some counties even have free-gelding programs, that usually run March to May, so don't miss your chance. Most common medical insurance doesn't cover it, however the costs are fully tax-deductible in most states. Finally, as a token of appreciation for the great value of this site, you could always send me the resulting balls, it'd make them into a garland, great Halloween decoration. I've been sent 1 pickled testicles so far. Thanks! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||